Friday, January 27, 2006

An Open Letter to President Hu and The Communist Party of China

Your Excellency,

May I introduce myself?

My name is Professor Peter Kurgman, and I am tenured at a major university, an avowed Maoist, and I am authority on all matters of progressive thought. I am a fountain of compassionate insights and I maintain a sharp sense of knowing how to correct the plethora of injustices on our Planet, our communal Home.

And I hold multiple academic degrees...three PhDs!

With those credentials, you can plainly see that my opinions have much influence and insight throughout the academic world, and in a broader sense, throughout all progressive circles. Therefore, I know that you will appreciate the gravity of my deepest respect for your decision to protect your people from the fascist assaults of unfiltered Google searches.

For example, when one does a Google search on the term "Mao murderer" in America, only pages with capitalist lies are returned:

- Murder by Communism
- Museum of Communism FAQ
- The long march to mass murder
- Amazon Listmania! - View List "Mao Tse tung: the biggest mass murderer"

However, at Google China, under your benevolent guidance, the lies are exposed, and we can enjoy some fascinating reads. Here, the first four pages returned are:

- Psychology read extensively
- Chinadaily BBS - Taiwan Issue - There is no official censorship in China
- Take note - Talk China (Excerpt: "Mao never intentionally to kill any innocent people or his political opponents.")
- Mao: The Unknown Story (A broken link to a criticism of the book)

I was also pleased to see that although the American site returned many "Mao murderer" images, your Chinese site returned not a single image! Congratulations, Comrade, for shielding your people from vicious lies.

And yet, I am afraid that I am a victim of a terrible, terrible mistake. You see, when one does a China Google search for "Kurgman", no links to my blog are returned! Certainly, this is an oversight -- most likely due to over-ambitious Peoples Guardians carefully inspecting American propaganda. But even though I am in America (I am ashamed to say), I do not sympathize with the fascists who are occupying the White House, and I am emphatically opposed to our filthy culture of profits and racism.

Therefore, I would be most appreciative if you could correct this error. (I know you will!)


Most Gratefully and Humbly,

Professor Peter Kurgman, Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D.

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